Imagework by Dina Glouberman, suggests calmly centring oneself then simply asking within for an image of one's House of Relationships. Seeing how things are Now is an opportunity to make significant changes if required. Keen to try it, I immediately saw (in my mind's eye) a young girl with two 'helpers' holding her arms while she had a foot on each door jamb refusing to go in, the way only a child can refuse. Something terrible had obviously happened and she had no intention of returning. It shouldn't have been a surprise; I was familiar with Jung's use of the house as an archetype of the self, and had known for years I'd 'jumped out of the window of my own self' and was 'living in an out house, I just never figured out how to move back In. Until Now.
In-House Training
I got spooked on the outside: the only way out was in. I shut out the world and went into retreat, a kind of soul vacation. I was in my own space with me 24/7. I liked it! I finished a lot of abandoned projects; created a peaceful writing oasis in my tiny cramped backyard garden; learned key chord families (which I'd always meant to do); read; wrote my journals, and many letters to long-neglected friends. I came home. I threw out a lot: old items, old thoughts, and habits. Knitting became a Zen practice enabling me to sit with myself while I tackled personal demons; ghosts from the past that had returned with a vengeance. I experienced peace like I'd never felt before, while still feeling under threat and vulnerable. I committed to wholly supporting myself having no-one else to turn to: a different kind of busy - self-invested - rather than all the many usual outer distractions: a revelation. An intolerable crisis had once driven me out; the same had drove me in. Thank God.Sitting Pretty
Working with clients struggling in the aftermath of sexual abuse I bear in mind two programmes I watched years earlier. One featured cleaners called in after tragic circumstances to remove blood, viscera, accumulated rubbish etc. Their remit is to ensure the place becomes wholly attractive once more - with no traces left of it's tragic past. The other featured a Life Laundry service, helping clients let go of hoarded 'stuff', discerning what to keep, and how to display 'treasures' otherwise hidden from view. The bonus was always a surprise make-over. I liked what both offered, and in my mind's eye would call upon such teams to help my own clients feel more comfortable in themselves: clearing away remaining vestiges of trauma, lessening the power of old associations, and creating sanctuary within. These teams work on other levels entirely, though yet may result in an outwardly tangible 'makeover' in the real world having experienced these changes within.
House Proud
Years earlier, for a Twisted Fairy-tale exhibition, I created The Goldilocks Files - a box set of altered, or treated, Goldilocks books. She seemed in search of a home; to get the feel of how other people lived, self-possessed creatures quite unlike herself. A trespasser; housebreaker, but without criminal intent as such. In search of nourishment, a place to sit, a safe place to sleep. She goes out there in search of this holy grail. Has anyone written about Goldilocks coming home to herself? The sequel? It was good to go through the books again - too long forgotten on a shelf. There are some still untouched that I may start working on. The thing about conjuring up these images, in whatever medium, is that they can be revisited and reworked. When I failed to enter my House of Relationships I opted for the Garden of Relationships instead - there's always a creative solution to every problem. Now that I've moved in to my Home-Self it would be good to unleash the artist-within. By chance today I discovered Katwise (www.katwise.com) who couldn't be more inspiring when it comes to decorating a house and making it exactly so...
